


The Morning After

by SoonerOrLater



Series: I Guess I'll Just Lie Here [6]
Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Angst, Coming Out, First Time, Fluff, M/M, New Relationship, post episode
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2020-09-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:54:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26289802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoonerOrLater/pseuds/SoonerOrLater
Summary: Patrick wakes up in Stevie's flat the morning after. And does some thinking about what all this means.
Relationships: David Rose/Patrick Brewer
Series: I Guess I'll Just Lie Here [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1886797
Comments: 13
Kudos: 122





	The Morning After

**Author's Note:**

> For David's part, see previous work 'Dawn Light'

Patrick flicked his eyes open and for a second wasn’t sure where he was. The wall he was staring at wasn’t his wall, the array of things on the bedside table weren’t his. The mattress felt odd beneath him, and he felt a weird sensation next to him….heat. His brain clicked in. David. It answered shortly after. Patrick was lying on his right side, at some point he’d clearly rolled away from the tangle of limbs he remembered falling asleep in. And David was behind him. He couldn’t tell how far away, or if he was awake yet. For a moment Patrick just lay there, staring at the wall. Almost afraid that if he moved he’d break some kind of spell. That maybe it wouldn’t be real anymore. 

Or that it would. And he’d have to think about it some more. He wasn’t sure what he was nervous about. But as he woke up a knot started to form in his stomach. Part of him longed to roll over, find wherever David was, and either wrap himself around him or get pulled into his arms. Anything to feel that contact, that reassurance that all was well. It was, he told himself. But then why did he feel...off. 

It was a blur. Last night. After the awkwardness, and the agreement to put things ‘in a box’ things became a blur. Secretly he’d been glad of the excuse to drink Stevie’s whiskey as it took the edge off the creeping nerves that threatened to overwhelm him. Once they’d started kissing some of that melted away. And once his brain was reassured they had all the time in the world this time, nobody was walking into the store, or by their car, or past the side street they’d ducked down...nobody was coming back to the Motel, or through the unlocked door to his room at Ray’s. There was no rush. 

He’d fumbled his way through he knew. He tried to stop second-guessing himself at every turn. David had been patient, and kind. Their brief quarrel had given way to a quietly patient- but also passionate- David, who was clearly conscious of his promise to take things slow for Patrick’s sake. He was caught between his desire to get everything ‘right’ to be ‘good at it’ and clear inexperience. As much as he wanted to style that out, he couldn’t. It was all new to him, and where and how to put his hands, his mouth, his whole self sometimes, felt awkward even though it felt more right than anything had in his life. 

David hadn’t seemed to mind his fumbling. He’d taken charge and guided him, laughed even when Patrick elbowed him in the side trying to find the right angle...Patrick’s chest swelled at the memory. He couldn’t remember laughing during sex, laughing peppered with kisses to say sorry, before resuming, under David’s guidance, a more focused, passionate approach. 

It just felt right. He felt right. They’d finally collapsed in a tangle of limbs, and Patrick registered David pulling a blanket over him and muttering about ‘getting cleaned up’ but that was the last thing he remembered. Until now. 

It was good. It was right. He reminded himself. It was just going to take some getting used to. Different wasn’t wrong, he reminded himself. Different was very much right. But different was still different. He’d got this far on instinct. On sometimes forcing himself to take charge. But occasionally, like now, he got too lost in thinking about it. And like now he froze. In those moments David could usually be relied on to take charge. Steer them through. Like the first time, they’d gone to the drive-in together. Patrick had wanted desperately to lean over and take David’s hand as he would on a date with a woman. He’d overthought it and ended up sat staring resolutely at the screen, hands folded neatly in his lap. Until, about 20 minutes in, he felt David’s fingers on his, quietly squeezing them in the dark until he looked across and smiled, interlocking their fingers. Until David got hungry and needed both hands for snacks. But then Patrick knew he could reach over and take David’s hand again. That it was ok. In theory, he knew everything was ok. He could do all the things he wanted to, it was the same as every other relationship. But knowing it, and doing it were two different things. As last night had proven. 

It had been amazing. Patrick kept reminding himself how good in every sense of the word it had felt. Nothing had gone wrong, he reminded himself. Everyone’s first time with someone new is awkward. And as awkward and fumbling as it had sometimes felt, it had still felt better than any other times. But he worried, he worried he wasn’t doing it right. That David, with all his experience, would be disappointed in him. It nagged at him they’d stuck to...hands...mouths...nothing more. It had been enough. More than enough- so much so at times he could barely cope. But he was conditioned to think ‘sex’ constituted certain prescribed acts to ‘count’ and he felt like what they’d done might not ‘count’ yet. And that it wasn’t enough somehow. He also knew David was holding back for him. Taking it slow.

He sighed, out loud, accidentally, then cursed himself. 

‘Hey’ David’s voice was low and soft, ‘You awake?’ 

‘Mmm’ Patrick said. But still didn’t move. 

‘Are you...ok?’ David sounded unsure. His voice is quiet and not just from sleep. 

Patrick worries that David hasn’t reached out to him. Usually so tactile, he’s keeping his distance. And then the penny drops. 

‘Are you ok?’ Patrick asks, rolling onto his back. This lands him closer, but not quite touching David, who is lying on his back, on the other side. His expression is impossible to read, he’s looking up at the ceiling. 

‘I asked first’ David said, finally turning his head towards Patrick. His eyes are dark in the half-light, and concerned. 

‘I’m good David.’ Patrick assured him, locking eyes with him and holding his gaze to make sure-for both their sakes. ‘Are you?’

David nodded with a small lopsided half-smile. ‘I’m good if you are.’ 

Patrick shifted his hand and found David’s under the covers, he touched his fingers lightly to the outside of David’s hand, feeling the tiny ripple of hair under his touch. Different. He reminded himself. But good- different. David half smiled again looking a bit confused. 

‘We don’t have to get up yet, do we?’ Patrick asked. 

David shook his head. ‘It’s barely seven’ 

Patrick grinned ‘What on earth are you doing awake so early?’ 

Something flickered across David’s face momentarily but he scrunched up his nose and made a face instead ‘Birds.’ He said, ‘Stevie needs to get pest control in’

Patrick chuckled, ‘I don’t think you can have birds exterminated David’ he stroked at David’s hand again, getting his attention back in an open, but intense look. He said ‘what’ with his eyebrow and a furrowed brow. But then softened a bit. 

‘Go back to sleep if you want.’ David said. 

Take action. He told himself. Take charge. 

He rolled onto his side, facing David, and reached out his arm, raking it across David’s stomach, coming to rest on his hip. With a gentle pull, David rolled into him, wrapping his arm across Patrick and pulling them close, so Patrick’s face ended up buried in David’s shoulder. He felt David squeeze him, a reassuring hand on his back and up to his neck. Patrick tilted his head up, paused for a moment checking in, and kissed David gently. David kissed him back, not hurried or asking anything more, letting Patrick guide him again. 

He reached his right arm over, bridging the gap between him and David, he felt David start a little but lean into his touch. He’d pulled a t-shirt and boxers on at some point, but Patrick could feel the heat of his body under the thin material. He rolled himself towards David and simultaneously pulled David towards him. It felt like he was trying to prove something. He pushed on kissing David passionately, moving his hands up his shirt, holding on a little too tight. A little breathless he paused for air, and David gently pushed him back. 

Patrick blinked at him. 

‘We don’t have to do this.’ David said, his voice was soft and kind. 

Patrick swallowed and flicked his eyes down. Which he knew David saw, then steeled himself again, leaning in for another kiss. David allowed it then pulled back. This time shaking his head. 

‘No.’ he said and Patrick felt his grip tighten on his shoulder. ‘I’m saying no, so you don’t have to.’

‘I-um’ Patrick stuttered, then couldn’t make David’s gaze. 

‘Hey.’ David said, putting a hand to his cheek, kissing him softly, ‘Remember that whole thing about ‘taking it slow’?’ Patrick nodded into his hand ‘That still stands.’ Patrick closed his eyes and felt David’s thumb on his cheek. 

‘I don’t want to let you down.’ 

‘Mmm’ David made the noise, the noise he made when he didn’t quite have words but was also trying to be nice, or comforting. Patrick had heard it a handful of times and it was possibly one of the most endearing sounds. It was like emotion escaping from him. He felt pulled into David’s arms, head buried in his shoulder. He reached around and returned the embrace letting David hold him for a second, feeling his face buried in his hair. 

David pulled back a bit and moved his head down so he was in line with Patrick’s ear. ‘You could never.’ he whispered. Patrick felt him swallow and squeezed him a little bit. ‘This stuff is fucking complicated’ David added, running a hand up and down Patrick’s back. He pulled back and looked at Patrick with an affection that near enough broke him. He felt tears pricking at his eyes and blinked them back. 

‘Who does this?’ he said, wiping a hand across his face. ‘I’m an idiot.’

David frowned at him and shook his head. ‘I cry all the time after sex.’ he said with a shrug, ‘You might have to get used to it.’ Patrick laughed a little, then focused on him. 

‘Really?’

‘Mmm-hmm’ David nodded, shifting so he could speak but also keep an arm draped around Patrick ‘In recent years usually because it’s so terrible, but that’s another story.’ a beat then panic in his eyes, ‘Oh god but not, I mean I didn’t mean.’

Patrick leaned over and kissed him ‘I know.’ he said ‘And I may be far from an expert, but that, last night well it wasn’t...bad was it.’ his face betrayed that he was in fact-checking. 

David gave him a lopsided grin. ‘Far from it.’ he said, a little bit of naughtiness lighting up his eyes and the memory, and Patrick grinned back. 

‘But I mean it.’ David said softed. ‘Sometimes I cry. And that’s ok. I mean it’s like actual science that the hormones you release during sex can triger other responses including tears, it’s a real thing.’ He bit his lip, ‘But sometimes, you know, the emotional connection, the impact of sharing...with someone. It’s ok to feel...that.’ he looked upwards, tears pricking his own eyes now. ‘Damnit’ he said. 

Patrick reached over and wiped at David’s face, which only sent the tears actually spilling over in David’s eyes. 

‘I know you’re worried.’ David said slowly, ‘And we can talk, whenever you want, about whatever you want...about my history, if it bothers you, or anything at all.’ 

Patrick nodded at him. ‘Ok.’ he said ‘Thank you.’ he found himself clenching his hand into David’s t-shirt. ‘We will I guess, I mean for both of us. But it doesn’t bother me. Not really.’ he smiled a little smile. 

David waited. Sensing there was more. Patrick leaned in and kissed him softly. 

‘Is it…’ David struggled with the words too, ‘This’ he said. ‘Because we can talk about any of that too.’ he put his hand on Patrick’s cheek ‘it’s one thing to fool around in the store cupboard it’s another to…’ he let his hand come down to Patrick’s side and pulled him in a little closer. 

Patrick closed his eyes. He propped himself up on one elbow, thinking. He was having trouble formulating any coherent thoughts. He couldn’t explain what he didn’t understand himself. Try he told himself. 

‘I feel like the girl’ Patrick hated himself for saying it. ‘I mean I hate that. I hate that that’s my frame of reference, and I know it’s bullshit.’ he huffed a bit and David squeezed his arm, he took a breath and continued, ‘But you know. As a guy, you follow a girl’s lead. You’re never supposed to not want to. But I often...not wanted to.’ David kissed his head. ‘But I did anyway’ David made a small noise of either sympathy or anguish, he wasn’t sure which, into Patrick’s head. ‘But now I don’t know where I...who I..’ he sighed. Again he didn’t have the words. 

‘Welcome to the joys of equality. Without the patriarchal standards of sex nobody knows where they stand. Or lay’ David chuckled, a little bitterly. ‘You take away gender roles and all bets are off.’ he said rubbing a hand up Patrick’s back. ‘The good news is, take away gender roles, all bets are off.’

Patrick frowned at him. 

‘We make our own rules.’ David explained. ‘And I mean ‘we’ in the broader sense but also’ he fixed Patrick in his gaze ‘I mean we’ 

‘I guess I just don’t know…’ Patrick sighed again. ‘I’m sorry David, I didn’t want the aftermath of our first...you know, to be like this.’ 

‘Rule one.’ David said ‘Nobody apologizes for anything to do with sex. Unless it’s ‘I’m sorry I used your Jo Malone candle for that David’ or ‘Yes that was a waste of perfectly good ice cream’’ David made a face and Patrick laughed. 

‘Oh I would never waste perfectly good Ice Cream’ Patrick said his face deadpan. 

‘Well, then we aren’t going to have a problem then.’ David said his mouth twitching at one corner as he tried to be equally deadpan, and failed, grinning as he finished speaking. 

Patrick laughed again. 

‘You think I’m joking. I never joke about quality ice cream.’

‘Noted.’ Patrick said. ‘What about chocolate syrup’

David wrinkled his nose. ‘That sugar, on the skin.’ he shook his head. 

‘No?’

‘No.’ he said with a little smile, biting his lip.

‘Getting a general no on the foodstuffs then’ Patrick said wryly. ‘I’ll have to consider other options.’

David quirked an eyebrow ‘Plenty of time to consider options.’ he said, then inadvertently yawned. 

Patrick frowned. ‘Not much sleep?’ 

David finished yawning. ‘You know birds and…’ he gestured vaguely. 

‘It’s still early.’ Patrick said, ‘Time to catch up on some sleep if you’d like.’

‘Mmm’ David said, leaning back down into the pillows, Patrick did the same, his face turned to his left, watching as David tried to settle down. 

‘David.’ Patrick said his voice softer now, ‘Could...umm…’ he frowned, not entirely sure how to say it. Again. He cursed himself softly. Closing his eyes again. 

Whether instinctually or consciously David got it and rolled into him, he pulled Patrick up on his side, and hooked a leg over both of Patrick’s, pinning him firmly, but not uncomfortably against him. Patrick worked his arms around David, running a hand under his shirt and holding on a bit too tightly with the other hand. David nuzzled into his neck a bit as they settled and Patrick sighed. 

‘Hi’ Patrick said finally when they were settled, ‘Can we start this morning again like this.’

‘Mmm-hmm’ David said into his neck. Patrick was suddenly very aware of being naked still, and if he was honest feeling a little sticky and grubby from last night’s exertions. But David had burrowed into him without a second glance. He wrapped both his arms around David tighter and squeezed, bowing his head into David’s chest as they shifted a bit more, getting comfortable, and kissing the base of this neck as he did so. David held on tight, a bit too tight for a moment then relaxed. They breathed each other in for a moment. 

‘I just wanted to ask you to hold me and I couldn’t’ he confessed, without being asked. Without moving from David’s hair he muttered ‘How stupid is that, after...everything’

He felt David squeeze him back. ‘Taking it slow remember’ he muttered. ‘Whatever that ends up meaning.’ 

‘Mmm’ Patrick murmured. ‘Let’s just start today again in a bit then.’ he finally felt his body relax, as David seemed to wind tighter around him again, just as he needed it. ‘Let’s just lie here a while.’

**Author's Note:**

> Again just my playing with how this panned out in their heads. Writing them both gives me a lot of insight into my own head too. 
> 
> I didn't realise I could find quite so many lying down scenarios for this series but there's a few more planned, if you enjoy these boys horizontal and all the thinking that entails.


End file.
